Writing Group submission by CSCLA participant, Ruth Brandt—a Los Angeles comedian who interpreted this writing prompt with humor. Enjoy reading!

Writing Prompt:

Imagine you are creating a greeting card for yourself. What would the front of the card say? OR, Design a greeting card for a life event that doesn’t usually get a card.

The Cancer Card…

Congratulations! You have breast cancer! You are the lucky one out of eight women to win the golden ticket. I bet you never saw that coming! Well, here we are, and what are you going to do with this? You can either stick your head under a pillow like a frightened flamingo, or confront this cancer twat like a boss. Your life will never be the same again, but maybe it can be even better. You probably want to rip this card into shreds by now, but please don’t. You get to decide here and now how to approach this. I suggest looking at the breast half full!

Let’s state the facts, shall we?

1. You’re alive.
2. You have medical care, you lucky b**ch.
3. You have a community of friends, plus two amazing cancer support groups.
4. You’re eating three meals a day, and have a bed to sleep on.
5. You write every day and channel your feelings through spoken word.
6. You just had a pedicure with light blue nail polish, and you feel impressed with yourself.
7. You’re looking to adopt a dog, who will most likely shed on and destroy every piece of furniture, but will also follow you around adoringly.
8. You have hope.
9. You laugh every day.
10. You’re friendly and chat with strangers.
Lastly, and most importantly, you look like Lady Gaga’s mother.

With love and best wishes,

Your spirit guides

P.S. Your father told us you should be eating an apple every day. It helps counteract the radiation treatments.

CSCLA’s weekly Writing Group takes place every Wednesday over Zoom from 1-3 PM.
To learn more about our group listing and how to join, click HERE.